I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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