I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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