i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
