Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
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