The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
