i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
