that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
