Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
So drunk, too bad you don't want this
and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
