Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize
