I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
