I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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