god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
Randomize
