i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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