we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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