i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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