That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
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