Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
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