Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
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