She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
