hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
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