if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
