I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Randomize
