This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
ALERT: Turns out when I'm drunk I turn into a clepto. I just found keys, a ketchup bottle, and sweatshirt in my backpack that don't belong to me. If yours, come collect from me. I'm still drunk in the back of biology lecture.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Randomize
