This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
