BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
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