did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
Dignity is for republicans.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
