Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Randomize
