So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
