fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I think I won the penis lottery.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I am naked and annoyed.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
