im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
