Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
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