Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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