Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Randomize
