We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
