Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Randomize
