Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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