Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Randomize
