these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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