i just google imaged poop.
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
