Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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