Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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