i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
there was a trapeze. enough said
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
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