Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
tell me about the eggs
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
