My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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