Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
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