would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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