Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Randomize