talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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