Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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