Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
she looked like the before picture.
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize
